


any way the wind blows

by metronomin



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Break Up, Idol Kim Mingyu, M/M, Past Relationship(s), Producer Lee Jihoon | Woozi, Secret Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-02
Updated: 2020-12-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 17:53:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27690289
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/metronomin/pseuds/metronomin
Summary: For someone who produces and writes love songs for a living (and is pretty damn good at it too), Jihoon has never been in love.(Or so he says.)
Relationships: Kim Mingyu/Lee Jihoon | Woozi
Comments: 18
Kudos: 64
Collections: November 2020 Birthday Challenge





	any way the wind blows

**Author's Note:**

> recommended fic playlist:  
> \- what kind of future // woozi  
> \- like a flowing wind // day6  
> \- i loved you // day6  
> \- song request // lee sora ft suga
> 
> title taken from bohemian rhapsody // queen

“Hyung, have you ever been in love?”

And this, Jihoon thinks, is why he fucking _hates_ Truth Or Drink.

Chan furrows his eyebrows. “Seriously? He’s never shown interest in anyone, and he works with all the idols! No way.”

“But he writes so many love songs!” Seungkwan protests. “And he’s old!”

They turn to him, the glint in their eyes curious and vaguely predatory. Jihoon exhales.

_Has he ever been in love?_

* * *

Jihoon’s first big production job, freshly promoted to junior producer, is for rookie soloist Kim Mingyu. He meets him in a conference room, Mingyu smiling at him from across the meeting table. Jihoon averts his eyes.

After Mingyu’s badass concept debut, his company wants him to sing a love song. Typical. Jihoon had expected it. What he hadn’t expected was Mingyu approaching him post-meeting, beaming down at him.“Nice to meet you, Jihoon-ssi!”

Jihoon blinks. “Me too.”

“Do you wanna get coffee with me?”

Technically, Jihoon has a scheduled nap right now, but Mingyu...

What could go wrong?

“Sure.”

(“By the way,” Mingyu sits, two Americanos in hand, “This _is_ a date, right?”

What. “Is that allowed?”

“Nope,” Mingyu grins, boyishly charming.

“Do you want this to be a date?”

Instantaneous. “Yes.” 

Logically, this could go terribly. But the way Mingyu is looking at him right now has Jihoon feeling something indescribable, and he’d be damned if he didn’t chase after it.

“Alright,” Jihoon says. “It’s a date.”

When Mingyu laughs, it sounds like sunlight filtering through glass.)

* * *

That first date leads to a relationship. Mingyu is famous, but not extremely so. Either way, they know the risks of people finding out about them; thus, anything remotely non-platonic stays discreet and indoors, and Mingyu’s mask remains perpetually on. A dangerous secret to keep.

Every day-off Mingyu gets is spent in Jihoon’s apartment. One Friday afternoon, they're tangled in warm sheets when Mingyu whispers into Jihoon’s ear:

“I love you.”

Jihoon inhales sharply.

Mingyu strokes his back. “I know it’s a little early, so you don’t have to say it yet. I just wanted you to know.”

Jihoon hopes Mingyu can’t feel his irregular heartbeat. _Am I being selfish?_ , he wonders. _No, we have time, right? Mingyu understands. It’s okay._

For now, he thinks, he’ll hide his feelings in his songs. Someday, he’ll give them to Mingyu to sing.

* * *

Over time, Jihoon becomes familiar with how his music tastes in Mingyu’s mouth.

The first time Mingyu finishes recording one of Jihoon’s songs, Jihoon slams his headphones down, enters the recording booth, and kisses him. It tastes like marshmallow, warm and pure and sticky. Jihoon wants to drown in it.

The next time, Mingyu collaborates with another soloist, Chungha. When the single is released, fans speculate about their friendship, and Mingyu laughs at Jihoon’s scowl. Jihoon shuts him up with his mouth. It tastes like cherries.

There are more flavours afterwards: peaches, peppermint, squash. Two and a half years after his debut, Mingyu’s popularity skyrockets with a song like dark chocolate.

Maybe that’s where it starts. Or maybe the cracks just become more obvious.

(“I’ll take you to the top with me,” Mingyu hums against Jihoon’s pulse. That evening, he’d won a Daesang with the song Jihoon wrote about him one velvet night. “Us against the world.”

“Lame,” Jihoon grumbles, fond. Mingyu pouts.

“You love me, though.”

Jihoon's blood ices over.

“Babe?”

Silence. Mingyu stiffens. The tension never really fades.)

* * *

The further Mingyu walks into the limelight, the further he walks from Jihoon’s reach.

**Jihoon**

You did great.

**Gyu**

I messed up :(

**Jihoon**

Didn’t notice.

**Gyu**

:/

**Jihoon**

Skype?

**Gyu**

Sorry, I’m really tired tonight :(((

Tomorrow!!! Promise :)

**Jihoon**

It’s fine, go rest.

Good night, Mingyu.

**Gyu**

Good night ~~~

Love you!!! <3

_(seen 01:19am)_

You know what they say about tomorrows: they never come. And about promises: they’re hardly kept. Put those together, and it looks like this: Mingyu leaves for his first overseas tour. Jihoon doesn’t see him off. Neither text the other.

* * *

Jihoon answers his phone the second it chimes with Mingyu’s custom ringtone.

“Mingyu?”

_“Hi, hyung, how are you?”_

Mingyu never calls him hyung.

“I’m fine. You?”

Silence.

“Mingyu?”

Beat. _“Let’s break up.”_

Jihoon’s heart cracks like an eggshell.

“Is that what you think is necessary?”

Instantaneous. _“Yes.”_

“Is that what you want?”

Pause. A heavy sigh. _“I think we both know it hasn’t been working for a while now.”_

Mingyu’s right, and when has Jihoon ever had the heart to go against his wishes?

“Alright,” Jihoon whispers, cheeks damp. “Let’s break up.”

Mingyu’s bitter, ensuing laugh sounds like shattered glass. _“Aren’t you going to say no?”_

Jihoon’s voice fractures. “Would it make a difference?”

_“Maybe.”_

Jihoon’s tongue feels like lead. The pause lasts too long. When Mingyu chuckles again, broken, Jihoon feels so, so small.

_“For someone who writes about love for a living, Jihoon-ssi, you have a lot to learn about it.”_

The call cuts. Jihoon sinks his head into his hands in slow motion, heart bleeding yolk all over the floor.

* * *

Jihoon writes exactly one song about it, intending to keep it for himself. However, he lets Seungcheol listen to it, and...

“It’s incredible,” Seungcheol remarks, earnest. “Use it, Jihoon.”

 _I’d rather die than hear someone else sing it_ , Jihoon silently pleads. _Please. It’s too personal._

(Ultimately, the song is picked up by a girl group, practically invisible amongst seventeen album tracks. It’s better that way, Jihoon reasons with himself.)

(Later, Jihoon notices the song in the official “Mingyu’s Faves” Spotify playlist. The gaping emptiness in his chest throbs like a fresh wound. By then, it’s been three years.)

(If this is love, Jihoon doesn’t want any of it.)

* * *

“Hyung?”

Jihoon realises his eyes have been boring holes into the table when he processes his friends’ expectant gazes. Chan tilts his head.

“Well…”

_(“For someone who writes about love for a living, Jihoon-ssi, you have a lot to learn about it.”)_

“...No.” Jihoon smiles, ruefully. “I’ve never been in love.”

(The secret remains a secret.)

**Author's Note:**

> find me on [twitter!!](https://twitter.com/dreamsforjeno)  
> thank you for reading!!  
> kudos and comments much appreciated <3  
> this is my first seventeen fic so pls be kind HAHA
> 
> little details i didn't have space to add:  
> \- jihoon's post-breakup song is "what kind of future" (obv)  
> \- in this au, "what kind of future" gets passed on to loona  
> \- the first song jihoon produces for mingyu to sing is "like a flowing wind" by day6, which inspired the title of this fic (the lyrics are quite apt)


End file.
